To many women, the idea of having phone sex sounds about as comfortable as faking an orgasm over dinner. But for couples in long-distance relationships, phone sex is often the only way to keep a sexual element in the relationship while the two of you are apart. Sandi, a 27-year-old whose boyfriend lives across the world says, “In our months apart, our relationship feels strange because it becomes completely asexual.” If your man is far away, or even if you live with him, phone sex is a hot way to spice things up. Here’s how to haaaave… ahh… ahh… oh-baby-I-want-you-so-bad! phone sex.
Testing the waters: Quite simply, phone sex is two people talking dirty on the phone while simultaneously masturbating and pretending they’re having sex with each other. Bottom line: It takes two to tango. But it’s best not to jump into initiating phone sex without testing the waters first. Start by sending him a dirty text and see how he responds. If he writes something sexy back, you’ve got the green light. If he doesn’t respond, or asks if your phone was stolen, you probably have to talk with him about it first.
Getting started: If this is something new in your relationship, take your time finding your comfort zone. “Work up to phone sex,” says 25-year-old Nancy, a long distance relationship-er/phone sex aficionado. “Start out by exchanging sexy text messages.” With sex texting you have time to think about your response, and see what things feel the most natural for you to say. It’s also much easier to text “I want u to lick me” than it is to say that over the phone. With that in mind, having phone sex means you’re going to have to feel comfortable talking dirty, saying words like “cock,” “pussy” and “tits.” If necessary, spend some time saying those words out loud until they feel like a natural part of your vocabulary. And if you really can’t stomach them, then just use vague statements along the lines of “Stick it in me.” After all, he should know what “it” is as well as where “it” is going. Another option: using body part nicknames that are familiar to both you and your partner.